Tag: Marriage

Saints Louis and Zelie Hold Open the Doors of Mercy

The marriage and family life of St. Thérèse of Lisieux’s parents invite us to practice mercy

This year in our archdiocesan Catholic schools, students have been making “Doors of Mercy” art projects. Behind brown construction-paper sets of cathedral doors, they have glued or drawn a picture of their own families. So when the door-flaps are opened, the family is revealed inside.

If we open wide the “Doors of Mercy” and look through them to see the ways we can let mercy flood in to our own marriages and our own families, what beautiful scenes of compassion, forgiveness, tenderness, presence, healing and encouragement are revealed? Celebrating the July 12 feast day of newly canonized Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin, the parents of St. Thérèse of Lisieux and her four sisters (they also had four little ones who died in infancy and early childhood), can help answer that question. Continue reading “Saints Louis and Zelie Hold Open the Doors of Mercy”

Get Touchy with your Spouse

Drawing closer physically ‘incarnates’ your love and can strengthen your marriage

Elizabeth Jordan was unhappy in her marriage. Her husband Tony was a jerk. They argued about money. They were emotionally distant. The love between them was almost dead. Elizabeth could, justly, complain long and bitterly about her husband.

What happened to transform their marriage so that they were helpful, loving and united again? Surprisingly, it was one party’s conversion. Elizabeth’s change of heart toward her husband changed her own behavior in the relationship. Together with her intense prayer support for him, this triggered the softening of his heart toward her and his own conversion to Christ.

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Courtship vs Dating

The term courtship may sound as old-fashioned as bustles and buggy-driving. It may call to mind a famous song about a certain Froggy and what he went a-doin’. But actually, the concept of courtship is experiencing a revival, with good reasons.

Reframing dating in terms of courtship can help parents set healthy boundaries on teen dating. Shifting from a “dating” to a “courtship” mindset can help single adults achieve greater happiness, too.

What’s the difference between dating and courtship?

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Marriage vs. Cohabitation

Ten reasons God’s plan for families is good news for everyone

Madeline and Matt Example have been together five years. Because of a choice they made, they are in a category of couples who are statistically happier, healthier and better-off financially than their neighbors, Caitlyn and Chris. They will stay healthier, live longer, accumulate more wealth and report higher levels of happiness and satisfaction in their relationship and in their whole lives. Their household is less likely to witness violence or abuse. Their 2-year-old daughter, Maggie, is in the safest, healthiest and happiest categories of kids. Because of her mom and dad’s choice, she is at the lowest risk of child poverty; she is likely to succeed in school and be a happy adult.

Caitlyn and Chris have also been together five years. But because they made a different choice, they are in a group that statistically reports lower levels of happiness. They are more likely to get sick, suffer from anxiety or depression, and will likely not live as long. Despite having similar jobs as their neighbors, Caitlyn and Chris have lower incomes and smaller savings. Sadly, abuse and violence is more likely in their household, between them and against their 3-year- old, Cooper. Compared with Maggie, Cooper is at a much greater danger of child poverty and academic problems.

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Saints who were happily married, widowed or divorced

November is the perfect month to call attention to happily married saints, as well as to men and women who stand out as shining examples of holiness after suffering the unhappiness of marriage’s end through death or divorce. The great celebrations of All Saints’ Day, All Souls’ Day and the solemnity of Christ the King make us mindful of our own deaths and the world’s end. Our hope and fulfillment is in Christ, our ultimate goal, whose mercy embraces and sustains us through the ups and downs of family life. He is near to the widowed and divorced as well.

In keeping with the upcoming Year of Mercy proclaimed by Pope Francis, may the mercy manifest in these saints’ lives inspire us to be generously merciful — especially with our spouses, our children and even with ex-husbands and -wives!

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Pope Francis’ Bite-Sized Advice for Families

The pope’s weekly teachings pop with truth, freshness and vitality

If you have five minutes and a smartphone while waiting in the grocery store checkout line, you have enough time to read one of Pope Francis’ recent Wednesday audiences on the family.

Through this yearlong series, Pope Francis has been preparing the church for the World Meeting of Families this month in Philadelphia, as well as for the bishops’ Synod on the Family, which will gather in Rome in October. He urges prayer for the success of these important events, and highlights the importance of educating ourselves more deeply about the truth of marriage and family at this time. Continue reading “Pope Francis’ Bite-Sized Advice for Families”

Healing a Hurting Marriage

Retrouvaille offers hope for couples on the road to divorce

One-quarter of all Catholic marriages end in divorce, according to the most recent data from the Center for Applied Research in the Apostolate. Chances are, at some point, most Catholics will encounter a family member, friend or fellow parishioner suffering distress in their marriage, even if they do not experience it themselves. The good news is that there is a successful Catholic program specifically designed to help heal and rebuild hurting marriages. Named Retrouvaille, a French word meaning rediscovery, it is offered several times a year in the Seattle Archdiocese. Continue reading “Healing a Hurting Marriage”